Question for Bernie
I am at end of Chapter 3 in the Art of Healing and faneeling stuck. I am a bit worried because today and yesterday I am having to work harder at staying positive. I just got an appointment with a medical oncologist for this Monday and I think she is going to be all doom and gloom. I am worried she will tell me I have “so long” to live. When all this opened up, my GP said I could live 1-2 years with chemo and radiation. He seemed to think this was a good thing!
Exercise….My left SI joint and down my left leg is very painful. I would describe it as like a rubber band that is stretched as far as it can be. It hurts to walk, sit, and stand. I cannot think of a relationship where I could use the same words to describe except maybe at times the relationship with myself –maybe today. Today I am impatient with my progress with the disease. I am so thin, holding my own but not gaining weight. I am spending 24/7 cooking and eating well, sleeping, resting, reading, staying positive, and doing Vitamin C treatments and acupuncture. The situation that stresses me is money and when it will run out. I need to move to cheaper rent, but I thought I had come to peace with that. In writing this to you, I see I am in my ego and thinking about all the people who are healthy just walking around, and then there is me. I ask myself, “Is this a bad dream? Am I going to die?”
So I am not sure what to pinpoint and eliminate. Any feedback would be great. Wish I could just have a big chocolate bar and have this all go away.
Yes, find your “chocolate ice cream of life” and start living it. Stop stretching yourself out.
How long you live is not about statistics but about you and loving your life by doing the things that give your body the message that you intend to LIVE every moment to fullest, however long you have to go.
Bet your doctors $10,000 that you will live at least twice as long as they predict, and you’ll find out that they won’t bet because they know it is possible. I’ll put up the money for you.
Response to Bernie’s Answer
Thank you, Bernie. I love the idea of betting my doctor. Just getting into that mindset brings my ‘Irish” out. I see I was/am slipping into being a victim and a sheep! What do you mean about ‘stop stretching yourself out’?
At the beginning of this, I thought my chocolate ice cream was me winning this, and then going out and coaching others. (I am a certified coach and I was afraid to go out and sell my coaching because deep down I did not think I had enough to offer, although any clients I had always said they gained tones from our work). How can I get myself out of this rut???
I am wondering what my chocolate ice cream of life is. I have lived my life trying to fix me, (tones of personal growth) and working. I have spent all my free time on growing but it is like I had/have this ceiling and I never went beyond it. I have never been satisfied with me. I was in a 20 year marriage and apart from running after one man, I have been alone. I have 3 children whom I love, my oldest son just had a baby and they live 2 hours away. Although I live close to my other son and daughter, they have busy lives so we don’t see each other much. I take responsibility in that I have also been busy just like they are. I have not yet learned how to relax and make time for friends and family or, in fact, fun.
I often think it would be nice to live in greenery in a modest rental, where I could have a few clients and then have time to be in Nature and also visit my kids and friends more often. Nature nourishes my soul.
Could the bold italic be my chocolate ice cream? And if so that seems a way down the road when I have this cancer under control? How can I get my mojo going now??? If I do not get it now, I am headed to die as a victim.
Bernie when I watch you in the movie you are so motivated and out there. You have a drive to help people live happy lives. How can I get some of that right now? How can I find that drive that you have?
Keep asking yourself what you are to learn from this experience. It isn’t just one thing—experiences teach us many things, so acknowledge them all. Emphasize the positive things you learn about life and yourself through the experiences of each day.
And definitely “yes” to helping others by listening to them, and listen to yourself and you will find your way. Stop thinking and judging yourself. Find love for yourself and your life and body.
Question for Bernie
It was a complete shock in November to be diagnosed with angina. My first reaction was anger and then wanting to cry, but I’m unable to release them (taught no to do such a thing). My blood pressure is not high, so after much research, am taking only Gingko Biloba and staying on a good vegetarian diet.
I am increasing exercise, am reading your book, and you suggest using drawing but my mind goes blank and there’s nothing to put on paper. This has happened in the past at workshops, so how can I approach this?
I do meditation, try to remember dreams, the word “blocked” came to mind and I recalled quite a few times I have been blocked from a heartfelt wish – blockage in the diagonal! I feel I’ve accepted the diagnosis and know that now is the only moment I have to live and try to be in it, but I’m a beginner. Thank you for your book and encouragement in it. Bless you.
Read books by Dr. Dean Ornish on reversing heart disease.
Also, take coenzyme q10, d-ribose, hawthorn, and magnesium (nuts are a good source) for your heart muscle’s health. Alternatively, you can also try an angina treatment trial. Meditate and say a positive mantra as you meditate.