Looking for a Father

Burgi HutchersonIt was heartwarming to hear you speak tonight to one of your callers. I am the lady from North Carolina who asked you about overcoming feelings of low self-esteem and low self-worth. I would like to thank you for being so willing to become a father figure in my life, and I would like to take this wonderful offer seriously.

I have had father figures in my life but on several occasions the feelings of parent-child went in the wrong direction, and the male figure introduced sexual issues into our relationship. Those experiences have brought a lot of grief into my life, which I believe  have largely been resolved now. But I don’t have a personal relationship with someone I feel close to as my father, although I do have a most amazing husband who treats me very well, and who is a great dad to our eight children.

So if you would still like to be my father—my “Chosen Dad”—I am honored to accept this wonderful offer and look forward to getting to know you better.

Sincerely and prayerfully,


A Note from Bernie:

When one has not had a good father, one must create one.
~Friedrich Nietzsche

Dear Burgi,

You are so brave to share the things you find difficult to cope with in your life—issues of self-esteem and self-worth—which so many people in our culture struggle with daily. What happened to you, though, as you reached out for the comfort you thought came from a man who, to you, represented a father figure, but who instead created a distorted, terrifying, and damaging world for you that most of us cannot even comprehend, calls out for healing.

father and daughter joyOne of the most important parts of my life has been the privilege of helping others in immediate and long-term ways. I love being Dad to my own five children and now a doting grandfather to their children, but it is still a great joy to me to share all that I have learned from being a parent with someone who needed a loving, emotionally supportive dad when they were growing up—and that need doesn’t end just because you are now a parent yourself.

So consider me your “CD”—Chosen Dad, and let me help you feel all the pride a dad can convey to his daughter—and there is so much for you to be proud of already in your life.

Peace and love,


Cropped .JPG (20 KB)