Q & A with Bernie – December 23, 2013

Question for Bernie:

Hope all is well. I had a dream this morning and I know part of its meaning, but not all. I was at a hospital telling a doctor that I would give birth to a baby in the evening or perhaps night time on the same day. The doctor doubted what I told him because I had a very small belly and didn’t look like I was pregnant. I kept telling him that I needed him to deliver the baby for me, and he reluctantly agreed. I was frustrated about why he didn’t believe me. He told me I must deliver the baby before evening time because it’s good “feng shui” (means luck, prosperity, etc.)  He told me that delivering a baby at night means bad luck. I thought, “What a superstitious doctor!”

Then, I went home. And I went to the restroom.  While sitting on the toilet seat, I felt something and looked down.  I saw the most gorgeous baby boy; he was smiling at me with the umbilical cord still attached to me. I was joyful, and gently picked him up and held him in my arms. I thought to myself, “Well, it wasn’t that hard to give birth to a baby.”

Then the baby spoke to me about stories that happened in the past. I asked him how he knew about the past and he told me he was with me all this time, even before he was born. It seemed to me that “my child” was a very happy baby boy, because he was always smiling joyfully. He seemed so wise.

Then I thought that someone needed to help me cut the umbilical cord, otherwise the baby would be attached to me forever. Before that happened, I woke up with a happy feeling.

I know this dream symbolized rebirth. It seems to me that wonderful things are going to happen to me or are happening to me now. It also means consciousness exists everywhere. That’s all I know. Is there anything I missed that you know and I don’t know? I would appreciate it if you could tell me more.

Thank you, Bernie.

Bernie’s Answer:

That is one of the clearest examples of how our dreams really reflect what we need to think about in our lives.  You have turned a major corner and your dream was, indeed, one about being reborn into a new life.

The last thing you have to recognize, though, is that in your new life, you don’t need anyone’s help to complete any process.  In your dream you were assuming that you needed to wait for someone to come and cut the umbilical cord and free you and your baby, but the lesson in the dream is that in your new life, you can do everything yourself—you have gained the strength and wisdom you have been seeking so that you do not have to be dependent upon other people.  You are free from those attachments.  You don’t need them to nourish you anymore.  You can do it on your own.



Question for Bernie:  “Childhood Trauma & Adult Anxiety”

I suffer from anxiety that is sometimes well controlled but sometimes grips me terribly.  I feel certain it is related to early childhood trauma, and when I am in its grip, it is as if I have a two-year-old inside me, screaming, and who cannot be soothed.  I would like to know how I can better deal with, or better yet, heal this anxiety.

Bernie’s Answer for “Childhood Trauma & Adult Anxiety”

When childhood trauma is still essentially running your life as an adult, you have only one choice and that is to completely abandon your past.  You have to pull out the memories, look at them without fear, resolve to eliminate them, say goodbye to those memories, and forgive whoever you identify as being a cause or an enabler of the childhood trauma you endured.  Without complete forgiveness, you cannot completely let go, and without completely letting go of those memories, you cannot take the power to run your life away from that two-year-old.

Once you banish those memories, begin to see yourself as the full grown-up you are and start purposefully behaving in all the adult ways you know is appropriate for your age and experiences that you have had as an adult.  Practice the adult behavior that you have not been doing (when the two-year-old has been taking over) so that you will learn what it feels like to face those particular situations as an adult.

For example, if you have been avoiding confrontation because you have not learned how to be assertive while remaining pleasant and in control, then you must practice that—over and over again until it finally seems like the “real” you. Identify all the situations you have been “turning over to the two-year-old” instead of handling them like an adult would.  These are the situations you must visualize yourself handling as a competent adult.  Visualize daily and whenever the chance presents itself, practice.  You must practice until it feels natural to behave like an adult in these situations.

Two things that I have found to be successful for people with crippling anxiety is first, think about something that made you actually laugh out loud—it could be something from years ago or something recent, but we all have one or two of those really funny memories.  You may have forgotten how it feels to laugh out loud at something you remember for no particular reason other than that it is so funny.  Think about those memories several times a day. Find a “Humor Workshop” or “Laughter Workshop” in your area. Genuine laughter takes feelings of anxiety away completely, and even if it is only for a short time, the lesson is that anxiety can be banished—you do not have to hand over your life to anxiety.

The second suggestion is to get a pet if you don’t already have one.  The unconditional love of a furry pet helps lower anxiety.  Pets bring our blood pressure down, and they do the same thing for anxiety.


Question for Bernie:  Continuing “Childhood Trauma & Adult Anxiety”

Actually, I do have two cats and a loving husband; I have had cats all of my adult life.

I am a therapist so I get plenty of practice helping others with PTSD.  In fact, it is a specialty.  But I don’t seem to be able to conquer my own.  And yes, I have a therapist myself.  She referred me to your website.   I read your Love, Medicine and Miracles many years ago.

Bernie’s Answer:  Continuing “Childhood Trauma & Adult Anxiety”

You are right about this uncontrolled anxiety coming from something you experienced in childhood that you have stored away in your body.  Draw some pictures of yourself for your therapist.  Use crayons, and make the picture of an outdoor scene or anything you’d like.

If you will also send them to me, then I will tell you what to look for which may help you figure out what happened to you as a child that has left you with uncontrolled anxiety.

Ask yourself this question: If you had a week left to live, would you still waste your time being anxious?  I have had people go from agoraphobia to white water rafting and sky diving when they learned they had cancer and were mortal.  But you can create the same kind of freedom by simply visualizing living in the moment, not allowing the useless emotion of worry, which is the foundation block of uncontrolled anxiety, enter your daily life.



Question for Bernie:

Bernie, what are your thoughts about past life regression through hypnosis?

Bernie’s Answer:

Past lives are for real in the sense that they represent the consciousness of those who preceded us.  That consciousness is a part of our minds.  Neuroscience has shown that our inherited DNA influences much more than merely our physical appearance and the illnesses and conditions we may be predisposed to.

Our consciousness is rich from the infusion of the vast consciousness that came before us, and it is our destiny to use all of that learning, and add to it during our own lives, to create a more meaningful life.

In my case, I used a sword to kill in a former life because I lacked faith, but in this life, if you think of the scalpel as a sword, I have used the sword to cure people—to save lives.