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  • New from Bernie Siegel

    Introducing Bernie Siegel's new audio download, Daily Meditations for Optimal Health. Selected for Dr. Bernie Siegel’s Prescriptions for Living best-selling series, these recordings are a combination of guided imagery, auto-hypnosis and meditations that relieve stress, open the heart, and deeply heal your mind, body and spirit. Learn more.     Available now. Order your copy online today at:  Hay House.
    Introducing Bernie Siegel's new title, Love, Animals & Miracles: Inspiring True Stories Celebrating the Healing Bond . The stories in this new book offer funny and heart-touching, true-life experiences that convey loving connections, amazing rescues, and healing with (and by) animals — both wild and domestic. Learn more     Available now in bookstores everywhere. Order your copy online today at:  Wisdom of the Ages, Barnes & NobleAmazon or New World Library.
  • The Art of Healing Support Group

    The group meets on the first Friday of every month from 2:00 PM - 3:30 PM Eastern Time. You may access the teleconference by dialing into the conferencing service at: 1-857-232-0158. Then enter Conference code 379552 and you will be connected to the group.

    This free phone support group will bring people together who are experiencing health challenges and create a community devoted to emotional, physical and spiritual wellness. With the help of Dr. Bernie Siegel’s sage wisdom, patients can find hope and healing as they embark on their path forward. By participating in this group, you may learn to embrace each and every challenge in your life as an opportunity for self-transformation.

    HOST: Dr. Bernie Siegel is a writer and retired pediatric and general surgeon who writes and teaches about mind-body medicine and the relationship between the patient and the healing process. He is internationally known for his best-selling book, “Love, Medicine and Miracles”. In 1978 he founded Exceptional Cancer Patients, a specific form of individual and group therapy utilizing patient’s drawings, dreams, images and feelings. ECaP helped to facilitate personal lifestyle changes and personal empowerment of the individual’s life. He has been a global pioneer in improving and humanizing medical education and medical care.

    CO HOST: Dr. Tobi Mansfield is a medical psychologist specializing in helping patients with chronic illness and is the author of “When God Talks Back: Madness or Mysticism?”. She is the director of the Miami Wellness Center in Miami, Florida and a member of the Royal Society of Medicine in London, England.

    Click for more information.

  • Ask Bernie a Question

    Have a question you would like to ask Bernie? Use the message box below, and be sure to include your e-mail address. Bernie will answer questions each Monday on his blog (see below). Thank you for sharing your question!

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  • A Message From Bernie

    If you had 15 minutes to live what would you do?

    Making phone calls doesn't make my list.
    Eating a quart of chocolate ice cream does.
    So find your chocolate ice cream whatever that may be.

    Peace,
    Bernie

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  • How to Attract Angels Instead of Devils into Your Life

    Good morning, lovely you!

    You have all heard me talk glowingly about my love, Dave. He is such an angel and has touched my life with such kindness and gentleness. Here’s the kind of guy he is.

    Not long ago, we had a snowstorm, and I awoke at 6:45 AM to find that Dave had ALREADY shoveled our entire driveway and had also cleaned off his car, mine, and two of our neighbors’ cars.

    When he came into my life, I felt that I had been sent an angel to watch over me and show me what being loved is REALLY supposed to feel like. Friends and colleagues, that know how wonderful Dave is have jokingly asked me, “How do I get my own Dave?”

    Why is it that some people have genuine love in their life and others have fake love and toxic connections? More importantly, if you are someone who has had the latter most of your life, what can you do to attract your own angel like my Dave?

    Well, I didn’t always have Dave in my life. I know what it is like to have relationships that seem to utterly destroy your joy and spirit.

    My first marriage was not a happy one. While my ex and I have since become good friends and I can look back on those days with love and kindness, that period of my life was incredibly dark. I felt utterly alone and unloved in my marriage. I felt like part of my soul of missing.

    Oh, there were more toxic relationships! One marriage didn’t teach me enough love lessons!

    One week back from my honeymoon to husband number two, I found out he had a girlfriend who had two children from two different fathers, and she was pregnant with his child.

    There was another one. I didn’t marry the next guy but we did live together and a restraining order saved my life.

    So how did I go from two toxic marriages and a toxic boyfriend to finding a man who shows me the utmost love, respect, and care? And how can you start attracting angels instead of devils into your life?

    Before we get into how to attract angels into your life, let’s first talk about…

    There is way more to this story over here:

    https://www.prudencesinclair.com/how-to-attract-angels-instead-of-devils-into-your-life/

    Much love,
    Prue

    Good morning, lovely you!

    You have all heard me talk glowingly about my love, Dave. He is such an angel and has touched my life with such kindness and gentleness. Here’s the kind of guy he is.

    Not long ago, we had a snowstorm, and I awoke at 6:45 AM to find that Dave had ALREADY shoveled our entire driveway and had also cleaned off his car, mine, andtwo of our neighbors’ cars.

    When he came into my life, I felt that I had been sent an angel to watch over me and show me what being loved is REALLY supposed to feel like. Friends and colleagues, that know how wonderful Dave is have jokingly asked me, “How do I get my own Dave?”

    Why is it that some people have genuine love in their life and others have fake love and toxic connections? More importantly, if you are someone who has had the latter most of your life, what can you do to attract your own angel like my Dave?

    Well, I didn’t always have Dave in my life. I know what it is like to have relationships that seem to utterly destroy your joy and spirit.

    My first marriage was not a happy one. While my ex and I have since become good friends and I can look back on those days with love and kindness, that period of my life was incredibly dark. I felt utterly alone and unloved in my marriage. I felt like part of my soul of missing.

    Oh, there were more toxic relationships! One marriage didn’t teach me enough love lessons!

    One week back from my honeymoon to husband number two, I found out he had a girlfriend who had two children from two different fathers, and she was pregnant with his child.

    There was another one. I didn’t marry the next guy but we did live together and a restraining order saved my life.

    So how did I go from two toxic marriages and a toxic boyfriend to finding a man who shows me the utmost love, respect, and care? And how can you start attracting angels instead of devils into your life?

    Before we get into how to attract angels into your life, let’s first talk about…

    There is way more to this story over here:

    https://www.prudencesinclair.com/how-to-attract-angels-instead-of-devils-into-your-life/

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    Posted in Relationships, Self-actualization | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

    Gross National Happiness

    I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by a conscious endeavor.
    ~ Henry David Thoreau

    I have written about the meaning of the word gross and our country’s Gross National Product, but I have never written about Gross National Happiness.

    Then I watched 60 Minutes.  The program discussed the policies of the government of Bhutan, which is seeking a policy of Gross National Happiness.  They want their citizens to be provided with the necessities essential for their happiness, such as clean water, adequate nourishment and an education.  They are controlling tourism and trying to present TV programs that will give their children more than our satellite broadcasts do.

    Whether they will succeed or not remains a question, but it is a joy just to hear that their interest is in happiness, and not about being bigger, better, and richer than anyone else.

    What is required for happiness? Maybe we all need to think that answer out again.

    Peace,
    Bernie

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    The Art of Healing Support Group

    By Lionel Ketchian

    Bobbie & Bernie Siegel,
    Theresa Waldron-Yancoskie & Lionel Ketchian

    Don’t miss his valuable free resource for people to learn lessons in healing. THE ART OF HEALING SUPPORT GROUP with your host: Dr. Bernie Siegel. The co-host will be: Dr. Tobi Mansfield a medical psychologist that will also be a gift for us.

    The group begins on January 3rd, 2020 and will continue on the first Friday of every month from 2:00 PM – 3:30 PM Eastern Time. You may access the teleconference by dialing into the conferencing service at: 1-857-232-0158. Then enter Conference code 379552 and you will be connected to the group.

    This is a very important support group for people who wish to heal. People from this country and around the world can now benefit themselves.

    This free phone support group will bring people together who are experiencing health challenges and create a community devoted to emotional, physical and spiritual wellness. With the help of Dr. Bernie Siegel’s sage wisdom, patients can find hope and healing as they embark on their path forward. By participating in this group, you may learn to embrace each and every challenge in your life as an opportunity for self-transformation.

    Love, Medicine and Miracles is the name of Dr. Bernie Siegel’s first best-selling book written in 1986. This event redirected his life. I don’t know if you have read this book, but If you would like to read a wonderful book by a great author that can have a positive impact on your health, then this is the book for you. One of the things that makes Dr. Bernie Siegel exceptional is the fact that he prefers being called Bernie rather than Dr. Siegel.

    I first met Bernie in 1986 when he wrote this book. He agreed to be on my radio show Successful Living on WADS Radio in Ansonia, CT. I had followed some of his writing before he published his book, so I was very excited that he was sharing his techniques and knowledge with the world.

    Bernie is a true role model for all of us. He is a genuine human being, a spiritual person and a medical doctor. He has reset the mark for the medical profession to understand that people are more than a body that needs to be fixed. Bernie showed us how to heal.

    In 1978, he founded Exceptional Cancer Patients, a specific form of individual and group therapy utilizing patients’ drawings, dreams, images and feelings. ECaP helped to facilitate personal lifestyle changes and personal empowerment of the individual’s life. ECaP is based on “carefrontation,” a loving, safe, therapeutic confrontation, which facilitates personal change and healing and is still running today.

    June 25, 2003 the Happiness Club had a dinner for Dr. Bernie Siegel to honor and celebrate Dr. Siegel’s work in bringing happiness to the world. The dinner meeting was held at the Peppermill Restaurant, located at the time in Westport, Ct. We had over 100 people attend. We honored him with a “Doctor of the Soul” award.

    In 2004, Bernie and Lionel were on PBS together when they presented: Conversations with Bernie, Health and Happiness: To Learn to Live and In the Journey Together.

    Since 2017, Bernie and Lionel have been running the monthly Woodbridge, CT Happiness Club at the Woodbridge Town Library located at 10 Newton Road, Woodbridge, CT 06525. The next meeting is Tuesday, January 21,2020 from 6:00 to 7:45 PM.

    In March 2017, Bernie was the first teacher on Happy U when it was created. Bernie joins us every Monday and you can be part of our Master Mind Group for a discussion on Happiness, Love and its Benefits. The next Happy U is: Monday, December 30th at 7:00 PM ET. To join the Conference Call dial: 1-712-770-8010 and enter code: 601695. The topic will be Happiness & Preferences! Happy U is the free Happiness School of Continuing Higher Education created by Lionel Ketchian.

    In 2016, Lionel joined Bernie’s radio show. Dreamvisions 7 Radio Network produces Mind Health Matters with Bernie Siegel, M.D., and with co-hosts Lionel Ketchian and Deborah Beauvais. Dr. Bernie & Lionel share expert advice on topics around Health and Healing. Their messages of hope, happiness and love are extended to all who seek a whole person approach for living life fully. Deborah Beauvais is honored to bring a feminine perspective to the show. Topics range from Bernie’s amazing journey of life to his books and favorite authors’ quotes, to God and everything in between. Doing this radio show with Bernie and Deborah has been a fantastic experience. We consider ourselves a radioactive family because we have grown to love one another. Join us and become part of our radioactive family for your well being. The show is on at: 12:00 PM and 12:00 AM EST. Broadcasts Weekly: Wednesday, Thursday & Friday. Go to: www.dreamvisions7radio.com

    In 2016 I became a co-host on the Bernie’s show on Healthylife.net Radio. On this program of Mind Health Matters, Bernie and Lionel give advice on personal questions about Health, Healing and Happiness. The call in number is: 800-555-5453. Bernie’s show is the first Tuesday of each month at 12:00 pm. View Bernie’s show information at the Healthylife.net Radio.

    Network. http://www.healthylife.net/RadioShow/Radio%20Host%20Profiles.htm

    In 1989, Peace, Love & Healing was written, and in 1993, How To Live Between Office Visits followed. Bernie is currently working on other books with the goal of humanizing medical education and medical care, as well as empowering patients and teaching survival behavior to enhance immune system competency. Bernie’s realization that we all need help dealing with the difficulties of life, not just the physical ones, led to Bernie writing his fourth book in 1998 Prescriptions for Living. It helps people to become aware of the eternal truths and wisdom of the sages through Bernie’s stories and insights rather than wait for a personal disaster. He wants to help people fix their lives before they are broken, and thus, not have to become strong at the broken places. Published in 2003 are Help Me to Heal (to empower patients and their caregivers,) and 365 Prescriptions for the Soul. In 2004, Smudge Bunny, a children’s book about how difficulties can become blessings. Then in 2005, 101 Exercises for the Soul was published, followed in the fall of 2006 by a prescriptions for parenting book titled Love, Magic & Mud Pies.

    Published in 2008 came Buddy’s Candle, for children of all ages, related to dealing with the loss of a loved one, be it a pet or parent. Published in 2009, Faith, Hope & Healing with inspiring survivor stories and Bernie’s reflections about what they teach us, was born.

    Also out was Words & Swords, Bernie’s poetry and chance to write and react with your own. In the Fall of 2011, A Book of Miracles was published with amazing stories and Bernie’s comments. In September 2013, his latest book The Art of Healing was published containing 60 drawings by patients and what they reveal. In November of 2015, Love, Animals & Miracles containing heartwarming, inspiring and informative stories about life was born.

    Bernie has been a global pioneer in improving and humanizing medical education and medical care. He has revolutionized medical care giving. Bernie says: “Exceptional patients manifest the will to live in its most potent form. They take charge of their lives even if they were never able to before, and they work hard to achieve health and peace of mind. They do not rely on doctors to take the initiative but rather use them as members of a team, demanding the utmost in technique, resourcefulness, concern, and open-mindedness. If they’re not satisfied, they change doctors.

    However, exceptional patients also are loving, and thus  understand the difficulties a physician faces. In most cases, my advice to a dissatisfied patient is to give the doctor a hug. Usually this makes the doctor more willing to respond to the patient’s needs, because you become an individual to your physician and are treated as an individual, not a disease.”

    Bernie said,”We must remove the word “impossible” from our vocabulary. As David Ben-Gurion once observed in another context, “Anyone who doesn’t believe in miracles is not a realist.” Moreover, when we see how terms like “spontaneous remission” or “miracle” mislead and confuse us, then we will learn. Such terms imply that the patient must be lucky to be cured, but these healings occur through hard work. They are not acts of God. Remember that one generation’s miracle may be another’s scientific fact. Do not close your eyes to acts or events that are not always measurable. They happen by means of an inner energy available to all of us. That’s why I prefer terms like “creative” or “self-induced” healing, which emphasize the patient’s active role.”

    Bernie says, “Spirituality means the ability to find peace and happiness in an imperfect world, and to feel that one’s own personality is imperfect but acceptable. From this peaceful state of mind come both creativity and the ability to love unselfishly, which go hand in hand. Acceptance, faith, forgiveness, peace, and love are the traits that define spirituality for me. These characteristics always appear in those who achieve unexpected healing of serious illness.”

    Bernie’s wife Bobbie died in 2017. Bernie lives in a suburb of New Haven, Connecticut.

    Thank you Bernie for all you have done to elevate our awareness. Thank you for the continuing support you provide for all those in need of it.

    Bernie’s website:
    http://berniesiegelmd.com

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    Posted in Mind / Body Medicine | Leave a comment

    Reflection and Affection

    Dear Everybody,

    If you are thinking about resolutions to make January 1, 2020, here’s one that almost everybody can easily keep, and it will pay off with the priceless dividend of self-confidence for the rest of your life.  Happy New Year!


    We are disturbed not by things,
    but by the view which we take of them.

    ~ Epictetus

    A while back one of our cats and I stood before the mirror.  The cat, named Miracle, seemed not at all concerned with the condition of her fur coat, her crooked tail, or other physical defects.  She just looked at herself and made no requests for a brushing, shampoo, or plastic surgery.

    I looked at myself and was not quite as happy with my body.  I felt it could use some changes.  But I guess I am not up to making the ones that would make a difference, and I am not one for plastic surgery.  I admired Miracle’s attitude and tried to learn from her instead.

    My sense is that she accepts herself, and I have trouble doing that.  I want to be able to look in the mirror someday and just say, “Hi, it’s me” to my body the way Miracle does.  Hopefully, with practice, one day I will be able to do just that.

    Every day greet your reflection with affection and acceptance.

    Peace,
    - Bernie

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    Posted in Animals, Self-actualization, Spirituality | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

    Cultivating Widsom

    Good morning, lovely you!

    Someone recently sent me a video of their kid in a Christmas play. While the baby Jesus was supposed to be the star of the show, one of the wise men was pulling focus. He was nervously rocking back and forth, seemingly needing to use the bathroom very badly. I guess drinking that big gulp or whatever it was he had right before the play wasn’t that wise of a choice. “Someday, he’ll grow up and know better,” I said to myself.

    And that got me to thinking…

    The old saying is, with age comes wisdom, but is that really true? I’m sure we’ve all known older people who seemed like genuine idiots and have known younger individuals who seem to possess true wisdom.

    So if it’s not age that gives us wisdom, what is it, exactly?

    This led me to do an internet search to see how other people defined wisdom. The dictionary definition of wisdom is: The ability to discern or judge what is true, right, or lasting; insight. Others defined wisdom as: to think and act using knowledge, experience, understanding, common sense, and insight…

    Knowledge can exist without wisdom, but not the other way around…Wisdom is a gift from God…Knowledge sees the quicksand; wisdom walks around it.

    While these are perfectly useful definitions, they didn’t give me any insights as to whether wisdom is something that only some people have, or something we can all cultivate.

    Then I found an answer given by the University of Florida, Gainesville sociology professor Monika Ardelt that I liked. She believes wisdom is, “a combination of cognitive, reflective and compassionate qualities.” Ardelt has studied the topic of wisdom for years and believes it is not something that only the elderly possess. She believes wisdom is something that can be cultivated by anyone and, once done, bring significant pay-offs in our lives. Wisdom helps us better deal with life challenges, such as declining health and the loss of loved ones, for instance.

    So now the question is, how can we cultivate wisdom? I will share with you some of the traits Ardelt has found wise people share to give you several pathways of getting there yourself, maybe even in the new year.

    Wise People Say Yes to Life

    Older people are presumed to be wiser because they’ve had more life experiences. Except that a lot of people haven’t really LIVED. According to Ardelt, one of the cornerstones of wisdom is experience. The more open you are, and the more you say YES to life, the more experiences you will gain. This is invaluable.

    In the coming year, work hard to get out of your comfort zone and have more of a variety of experiences. Make new friends, go on road trips, volunteer, take a class!

    Learn from Those Experiences

    It’s not enough to gain new experiences – you’ve also got to learn from those experiences. What’s the point of traveling all the way to Peru if you are going to look through the same old lens? Open yourself up and always be on the lookout for lessons.

    They Don’t Know More, Per Se – They Know Deeper Wisdom is not about knowing a bunch of facts.

    There are plenty of college graduates with Ph.D.’s who have no wisdom at all. Ardelt says, “But the interesting thing is not that they know more, about, say, the origin of the universe … wise people actually know the deeper meaning of things that are generally known, actually.” ​

    Find out more…https://www.prudencesinclair.com/a-new-year-a-new-chance-to-become-wise/

    Much love,
    Prue

    Good morning, lovely you!

    Someone recently sent me a video of their kid in a Christmas play. While the baby Jesus was supposed to be the star of the show, one of the wise men was pulling focus. He was nervously rocking back and forth, seemingly needing to use the bathroom very badly. I guess drinking that big gulp or whatever it was he had right before the play wasn’t that wise of a choice. “Someday, he’ll grow up and know better,” I said to myself.

    And that got me to thinking…

    The old saying is, with age comes wisdom, but is that really true? I’m sure we’ve all known older people who seemed like genuine idiots and have known younger individuals who seem to possess true wisdom.

    So if it’s not age that gives us wisdom, what is it, exactly?

    This led me to do an internet search to see how other people defined wisdom. The dictionary definition of wisdom is: The ability to discern or judge what is true, right, or lasting; insight. Others defined wisdom as: to think and act using knowledge, experience, understanding, common sense, and insight…

    Knowledge can exist without wisdom, but not the other way around…Wisdom is a gift from God…Knowledge sees the quicksand; wisdom walks around it.

    While these are perfectly useful definitions, they didn’t give me any insights as to whether wisdom is something that only some people have, or something we can all cultivate.

    Then I found an answer given by the University of Florida, Gainesville sociology professor Monika Ardelt that I liked. She believes wisdom is, “a combination of cognitive, reflective and compassionate qualities.” Ardelt has studied the topic of wisdom for years and believes it is not something that only the elderly possess. She believes wisdom is something that can be cultivated by anyone and, once done, bring significant pay-offs in our lives. Wisdom helps us better deal with life challenges, such as declining health and the loss of loved ones, for instance.

    So now the question is, how can we cultivate wisdom? I will share with you some of the traits Ardelt has found wise people share to give you several pathways of getting there yourself, maybe even in the new year.

    Wise People Say Yes to Life

    Older people are presumed to be wiser because they’ve had more life experiences. Except that a lot of people haven’t really LIVED. According to Ardelt, one of the cornerstones of wisdom is experience. The more open you are, and the more you say YES to life, the more experiences you will gain. This is invaluable.

    In the coming year, work hard to get out of your comfort zone and have more of a variety of experiences. Make new friends, go on road trips, volunteer, take a class!

    Learn from Those Experiences

    It’s not enough to gain new experiences – you’ve also got to learn from those experiences. What’s the point of traveling all the way to Peru if you are going to look through the same old lens? Open yourself up and always be on the lookout for lessons.

    They Don’t Know More, Per Se – They Know Deeper Wisdom is not about knowing a bunch of facts.

    There are plenty of college graduates with Ph.D.’s who have no wisdom at all. Ardelt says, “But the interesting thing is not that they know more, about, say, the origin of the universe … wise people actually know the deeper meaning of things that are generally known, actually.” 

    Find out more…https://www.prudencesinclair.com/a-new-year-a-new-chance-to-become-wise/

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    Posted in Relationships, Self-actualization | Tagged , | Leave a comment

    Insight

    Wisdom unfiltered through personal experience does not become a part of the moral tissue.
    ~ Edith Wharton

    What is usually called “wisdom” is passed on generation after generation within a family because of the beneficial effect it has had over the years.  However, what many of us call wisdom is really insight.  Insight is a source of wisdom when it does not come from fear.

    Learn not to be afraid of life and not to listen to the negative insights that come from a fear of life and not the experience of it.  I love what Mark Twain said about experience:  “We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it—and stop there; lest we be like the cat that sits down on the hot stove-lid.  She will never sit down on a hot stove-lid again—and that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.”

    So learn from the insights you obtain and those of the wise who have preceded you, so as not to live like the cat that Twain talks about.  If you have been raised by a mother cat that didn’t teach you this, then go out and learn the truth for yourself.

    Those who keep themselves and their minds focused on what is good, positive, sure, and solid will gain wisdom.

    Wisdom unfiltered through personal
    experience does not become
    a part of the moral tissue.
    ~ EDITH WHARTON

    What is usually called “wisdom” is passed on generation after generation within a family because of the beneficial effect it has had over the years. However, what many of us call wisdom is really insight. Insight is a source of wisdom when it does not come from fear.

    Learn not to be afraid of life and not to listen to the negative insights that come from a fear of life and not the experience of it. I love what Mark Twain said about experience: “We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it—and stop there; lest we be like the cat that sits down on the hot stove-lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove-lid again—and that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.”

    So learn from the insights you obtain and those of the wise who have preceded you, so as not to live like the cat that Twain talks about. If you have been raised by a mother cat that didn’t teach you this, then go out and learn the truth for yourself.

    Soulution of the Day

    Those who keep themselves and their minds focused
    on what is good, positive, sure, and solid will gain wisdom.
    Wisdom unfiltered through personal
    experience does not become
    a part of the moral tissue.
    ~ EDITH WHARTON

    What is usually called “wisdom” is passed on generation after generation within a family because of the beneficial effect it has had over the years.  However, what many of us call wisdom is really insight.  Insight is a source of wisdom when it does not come from fear.

    Learn not to be afraid of life and not to listen to the negative insights that come from a fear of life and not the experience of it.  I love what Mark Twain said about experience:  “We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it—and stop there; lest we be like the cat that sits down on the hot stove-lid.  She will never sit down on a hot stove-lid again—and that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.”

    So learn from the insights you obtain and those of the wise who have preceded you, so as not to live like the cat that Twain talks about.  If you have been raised by a mother cat that didn’t teach you this, then go out and learn the truth for yourself.

    Soulution of the Day

    Those who keep themselves and their minds focused
    on what is good, positive, sure, and solid will gain wisdom.

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    Posted in Parenting & Family, Self-actualization | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

    Scrape the Old so the New Can Stick

    Good morning, lovely you!

    During my recent trip to Florida, I would walk by a house each morning on my way to the beach. The house was being repainted and every morning there would be one or two guys out on ladders painstakingly scraping off every inch of old cracked and bubbled paint.

    Seeing them reminded me of the time I brought home an old dresser someone had left out on their curb. I was in my early 20s and free furniture was NOT something you passed up. I decided to repaint the dresser but didn’t bother to scrape and sand the original paint off that had begun to bubble and crack in quite a few places. Hey, I was young I didn’t know.

    Well, needless to say, my new paint couldn’t really stick and the dresser looked AWFUL!

    This is what happens to so many of us who decide we want to become a better version of ourselves. We have an idea of what the transformation should be, we plan on how we’ll get there, but we don’t bother to scrape away at our old, outdated and no-longer-beneficial selves first. And then we find, months later, that our new selves can’t stick because our old selves are right there under the surface screwing things up!

    As the new year approaches, I know many of you are determined to live with greater passion, purpose and integrity. I know you want to take better care of your mind, body and spirit, and that’s wonderful, but if you don’t release those parts of you that no longer suit you, then your new vision can’t take hold.

    Before the new year begins and you set out to become the next version of yourself, take some time to say goodbye to the old version. Let go of those toxic behaviors and patterns that prevent you from living the life you’re meant to live.

    Here are some ways you can release and let go of that which no longer serves your higher purpose:

    Let Go of Blame

    Real change requires personal power. Blaming others for your problems gives away your power. If you want to truly transform your life, you’ll need to stop the blame game and take FULL responsibility for your life.

    Let Go of Your Need to Please

    Over the years, the people I have met who have been diagnosed with cancer and other serious diseases usually all have one thing in common: they are people pleasers. They typically make sure everyone in their life is okay and has everything they need, while at the same time completely ignoring their own needs.

    You have got to take care of your own needs first, or you won’t have anything to give others. Get comfortable with saying “no” more often and taking time for yourself. Do NOT confuse self-love and self-care with selfishness. They are completely different things.

    Let Go of Trying to be Perfect

    Perfect doesn’t exist. So many people try and reach perfect because they believe if they become “perfect” they will finally be loved and accepted. But how can you really receive love from others when you obviously don’t love yourself?

    To REALLY love yourself is to love your flaws and shortcomings. Becoming a better version of yourself does not mean to become perfect. It means to let go of what no longer serves you so you can step into your true potential and purpose.

    Let Go of Allowing Your Emotions to Dictate Your Decisions

    Our emotions are great at telling us what is or isn’t working in our life. When we’re angry, frustrated or anxious, we know that something is not right in our world.

    But as important of a messenger as an emotion is, you should never let it decide what action you take. Think of your emotion as a private in the army. This private runs into the room and hands the general a message, but the private then leaves the general to decide what steps to take next.

    You are not your emotions and your emotions are not who you are. Never suppress your emotions, but don’t let them dictate your life.

    Let Go of Your Inner Critic

    We all have that voice in our head that tells us we’re not good enough. Make a mistake, the voice is the first one to say, “I told you so.”

    The voice gets REALLY loud at times of growth because it knows you are about to kick it to the curb. So it YELLS AT YOU to try and bring you down a peg or two, so you will give it your power.

    As you head into the new year, poised for tremendous growth, it’s time to let that inner critic go once and for all. Don’t fight with it. In fact, do the opposite. Thank it for trying to help you and let it know it is no longer needed. During the days and weeks that follow, it will still chatter away, and each time it does, simply turn the volume down in your head a little bit more and a little bit more. Eventually you will no longer hear it.

    Scraping old paint off houses or furniture is no fun. And scraping our old selves away is equally labor-intensive. But the truth is, unless we let our old selves go, we get in the way of our new selves sticking.

    Much love,
    Prue

    Https://www.pruesplace.com

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    Ring True

    You can tell the man who rings true from the man who rings false, not by his deeds alone, but also his desires.
    ~ Democritus

    “What would I do now?”

    We have a prayer bowl at home that gives off beautiful tones when it is rubbed or struck.  I wish that we as people could ring true like that bowl.  When we are struck by one of life’s happenings do we ring true?  Do we live up to the sermons we deliver?

    I always know when something doesn’t ring true.  Like the feeling I have when I discover that a marriage counselor has been divorced five times or when I see a fitness consultant taking a cigarette break. I want the people I deal with to live their message.  I am not criticizing, I just want honesty.  I demand it of myself and expect it of others.

    The next time something or someone doesn’t feel quite right to you, listen for the sound of the ring.  Is it true? Check to see if your actions ring true. I ask myself, “What would I do now?” Ask yourself the same question!

    Peace,
    Bernie

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    Read My Mind

    Intuition is a spiritual faculty
    and does not explain, but simply
    points the way.

    ~ Florence Scovel Shinn

    The other day I wanted to groom our four cats, bathe our dog, clip their toenails, and brush their teeth.  As soon as I thought about doing it, our dog went to the other end of the house to hide.  Then our most fearful cat jumped off the sofa and hid under the furniture.  They were able to read my thoughts.  I had no equipment out and hadn’t picked anyone up at that point.  I was just thinking about it.

    I have no doubt that we can read each other’s minds and communicate without speaking.  I test the animals by thinking different things as I approach them.  When they are aware that I have no intention of grooming them, they lie in my path and I have to step over them.  But if I walk into the room thinking about something they don’t want, like a trip to the vet, they are gone.  Two outdoor cats didn’t show up for a week when I made a vet appointment for their annual checkup.  When I canceled the appointment they showed up for breakfast THE NEXT DAY.

    Sometimes we block our intuitive abilities and take our antennas down, because as humans we talk only in words.  Animals have many ways of communicating, using sounds, images, or intuition.  Like them we need to become more aware of our other sources of communication.

    Remember to be open to listening and speaking without words.

    Peace,
    Bernie

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    Are Your Perspectives Too Tight?

    Hello Lovely You!

    Here are some ways you can begin to gain some fresh, new perspectives about your life.

    My tea is steaming and little Zuzu is sleeping. It’s time for some A-ha moments!

    When was the last time you had an A-ha moment? A-ha moments are gifts from the Universe. When they happen, they feel as if something divine and holy tapped us on the head, making our vision suddenly clearer. In that moment we instantly “get” something we didn’t understand just a moment before.

    A-ha moments change our perspective about things, and with this change in perspective, or change of mind, our lives are changed.

    Imagine if we could do something that would help us have more of these A-ha moments. Imagine how are lives, relationships, health, and financial situation could improve from this new clarity.

    You don’t have to wait for divine inspiration to tap you on the head. You can decide to change your own perspective to gain clarity. You can change your perspective about any number of things in your life, and once you do – look out!

    Are Your Perspectives Too Tight?

    Perspectives, ideas, beliefs… however you want to think of them… are a bit like shoes.

    When you were little, you wore baby shoes. Eventually you grew out of those and got bigger shoes. And year after year you kept growing out of your shoes, and year after year you got new ones that fit you well and helped you get around.

    Imagine if you were forced to wear your baby shoes as a grown adult. They’d fit around your big toes and the rest of your foot would be exposed to the elements, exposed to broken pieces of glass in the road, ice, snow, rain. If you were forced to wear your baby shoes you wouldn’t get very far.

    How far are your current perspectives taking you? Do they still fit? Or have you been wearing these same old perspectives for years and years, unable to recognize that they are too tight and doing you more harm than good?

    How is it that most people are aware they have outgrown their clothes, shoes, hairstyles, and living room furniture but they have NO IDEA that their perspectives on their life are old, tattered, shabby and out of date?

    Fresh perspectives are incredibly important when we are facing big challenges such as a major health crisis. Cancer changes everything. Problems often seem insurmountable until we gain a new perspective.

    Let this new year, 2020, be a time when you take stock of the perspectives you have and decide which should stay and which need updating.

    As we know here at Prue’s Place some changes are good for us because our lives may have needed to change.

    5 Ways You Can Begin Changing Your Perspective

    Changing your perspective will take a bit of effort. When you consider the effort we all put into updating our iPhones and other tech gadgets, I think you’ll agree our perspectives deserve as much if not more.

    Here are some ways you can begin to gain some fresh, new perspectives about your life:

    1. Be Honest With Yourself

    Before you can change you must realize the need for change, and to do that, you must be 100% honest about your life. That’s actually one of the blessings about being diagnosed with a life-threatening disease, you are forced to take an honest look at yourself, your life choices, your needs and your habits. Be open to the idea that your old ideas and mindsets helped you to land where you are right now and allow yourself the freedom to explore new options.

    2. Put Yourself in New Situations

    Doing the same old thing day in and day out is NOT going to help you gain fresh perspectives. If you’ve always been an introvert, push yourself to get out more. Join a club, volunteer, try and meet new people. Read more books, watch more documentaries, travel if you can. The more ‘newness” you can be around, the more able you will be the create new mindsets.

    3. Remove Toxic Influences

    Mind changes must be done in a positive environment. Now is the time to step away from all negativity in your life. Stop watching the news or reading the paper, stop gossiping and being around others who only like to tear things and people down. Stop the negative chatter in your own mind and replace it with positive talk.

    4. Use Your Imagination

    Imagine how life looks, feels and seems from other people’s perspectives. How do they act? What makes them act like that? Maybe you see the same person at chemo treatment and they are always smiling and laughing. Imagine being them for a moment. What life perspective do they have that allows them to feel joy inside the darkness?

    Imagine thinking, feeling and seeing things in a more positive way. The more you do it, the more your imagined states of being become your natural ways of being.

    5. Spend Quiet Time with Yourself

    Whether it’s by meditation or simply taking a quiet walk in nature, it’s important that you quiet yourself as much as possible. A-ha moments tend to come during quiet moments.

    Your life can be anything you want it to be. Literally. But you have to think it is something before it can be that something. Take a good, honest look at your entire life and see if you have some perspectives that don’t fit any more. Then, use these strategies to gain some new, fresh perspectives that will help you create a healthier, happier, more abundant life.

    Prue thought of the day: ”It’s time to change things up, and create the grandest vision of your life. Remember, you will become what you believe.”

    Love you,
    Prue

    https://ww.pruesplace.com

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